LAZY A MANIFESTO by Tim how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar Krieder – MusicPervs

Long story short, tonight we talk about avoiding and escaping ‘busy’ masochism; tonight we recalibrate our perspective about a dire need to how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar remaster a crelative skill of doing absolutely nothing, about appreciating emptiness and laziness and in the process also how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar cultivate the long lost art of harnessing boredom.

Tonight we burn this screwed up, forced-upon ’employment’ capitalist culture and dissect open ‘ unemployment’ from a fresh new lenses. Also, please keep in mind an age old adage, “no amount of money bought a single second.”, as you navigate around those lines of a following meaningful, juicy essay called LAZY: A MANIFESTO by tim krieder’s from his essay collection book ‘we learn nothing’ the essay begins…

If you live in america in the 21st century you’ve probably had to listen to a lot of people how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar tell you how busy they are. It’s become the default response when you ask anyone how how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar they’re doing: “busy!” “ so busy.” “ crazy busy.” it is, pretty obviously, a boast disguised as a complaint. And the stock response is a kind of congratulation: “that’s a good problem to have,” or “better than the opposite.”

This frantic, self-congratualtory busyness is a distinctly upscale affliction. Notice it isn’t generally people pulling back-to-back shifts in the ICU, taking care of their senescent parents, or holding down three minimum-wage jobs they have to commute to by bus who how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar need to tell you how busy they are; what those people are is not busy but tired. Exhausted. Dead on their feet. It’s most often said by people whose lamented busyness is how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar purely self-imposed: work and obligations they’ve taken on voluntarily, classes and activities they’re “encouraged” their kids to participate in. They’re busy because of their own ambition or drive or how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar anxiety, because they are addicted to busyness and dread what they how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar might have to face in its absence.

Almost everyone I know is busy. They feel anxious and guilty when they aren’t working or doing something to promote their work. They schedule in time with their friends the way 4.0 students make sure to sign up for some extracurricular how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar activities because they look good on college applications. I recently wrote a friend asking if he wanted to how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar do something this week, and he answered that he didn’t have a lot of time but if something was how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar going on to let him know and maybe he could how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar ditch work for a few hours. My question had not a preliminary heads-up to some future invitation: this was the invitation. I was hereby asking him to do something with me. But his busyness was like some vast churning noise through how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar which he as shouting out at me, and I gave up trying to shout back over it.

I recently learned a neologism that, like political correctness, man cave, and content-provider, I instantly recognized as heralding an ugly new turn in how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar the culture: planshopping. That is, deferring committing to any one plan for an evening until how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar you know what all your options are, and then picking the one that’s most likely to be fun/advance your career/have the most girls at it — in other words, treating people like menu options or products in a catalog.

Even children are busy now, scheduled down to the half hour with enrichment classes, tutorials, and extracurricular activities. At the end of the day they come home as how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar tired as grownups, which seems not just sad but hateful. I was a member of the latchkey generation, and had three hours of totally unstructured, largely unsupervised time every afternoon, time I used to do everything from scouring the world how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar book encyclopedia to making animated movies to convening with friends how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar in the woods in order to chuck dirt clods directly how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar into one another’s eyes, all of which afforded me knowledge, skills, and insights that remain valuable to this day.

The busyness is not a necessary or inevitable condition of how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar life; it’s something we’ve chosen, if only by our acquiescence to it. I recently skyped with a friend who had been driven how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar out of new york city by the rents and now how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar has an artist’s residency in a small town in the south of how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar france. She described herself as happy and relaxed for the first how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar time in years. She still gets her work done, but it doesn’t consume her entire day and brain. She says it feels like college — she has a circle of friends there who all go how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar out to the cafe or watch TV together every night. She has a boyfriend again. (sh once ruefully summarized dating in new york: “everyone is too busy and everyone thinks they can do how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar better.”) what she had mistakenly assumed was her personality — driven, cranky, anxious, and sad — turned out to be a reformative effect of her environment, of the crushing atmospheric pressure of ambition and competitiveness. It’s not as if any of us wants to live how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar like this, any more than any one person wants to be part how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar of a traffic jam or stadium trampling or the hierarchy how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar of cruelty in high school; it’s something we collectively force one another to do. It may not be a problem that’s soluble through any social reform or self-help regimen; maybe it’s just how things are. Zoologist konrade lorenz calls “the rushed existence into which industrialized, commercialized man has precipitated himself” and all its attendant afflictions — ulcers, hypertension, neuroses, etc. — an “inexpedient development,” or evolutionary maladaptation, brought on by our ferocious intraspecies competition. He likens us to birds whose alluringly long plumage has how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar rendered them flightless, easy prey.

I can’t help but wonder whether all this histrionic exhaustion isn’t a way of covering up the fact that most how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar of what we do doesn’t matter. I once dated a woman that interned at a magazine how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar where she wan’t allowed to take lunch hours out, lest she be urgently needed. This was an entertainment magazine whose raison d’etre had been obviated when menu buttons appeared on remotes, so it’s hard to see this pretense of indispensability as anything how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar other than a form of institutional self-delusion. Based on the volume of my email correspondence and the how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar amount of internet ephemera I am forwarded on a daily how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar basis, I suspect that most people with office jobs are doing how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar as little as I am. More and more people in this country no longer make how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar or do anything tangible; if your job wasn’t performed by a cat or a boa constrictor or how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar a worm in a tyrollean hat in a richard scarry how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar book I’m not convinced it’s necessary. Yes, I know we’re all very busy, but what, exactly, is getting done? Are all those people running late for meetings and yelling how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar on their cell phones stopping the spread of malaria or how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar developing feasible alternatives to fossil fuels or making anything beautiful?

The busyness serves as a kind of existential reassurance, a hedge against emptiness: obviously your life cannot possibly be silly or trivial or how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar meaningless if you are so busy, completely booked, in demand every hour of the day. All this noise and rush and stress seem contrived to how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar drown out or over up some fear at the center how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar of our lives. I know that after I’ve spent a whole day working for running errands or how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar answering emails or watching movies, keeping my brain busy and distracted, as soon as I lie down to sleep all the how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar niggling quotidian worries and big picture questions I’ve successfully kept at bay come crowding into my brain how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar like monsters swarming out of the closet the instant you how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar turn off the nightlight. When you ty to meditate, your brain suddenly comes up with a list of a how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar thousand urgent items you should be obsessing about rather than how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar simply sit still. One of my correspondents suggests that what we’re all so afraid of is being left alone with how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar ourselves.

I’ll say it: I am not busy. I am the laziest ambitious person I know. Like most writers, I feel like a reprobate who does not deserve to how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar live on any day that I do not write, but I also feel like 4 or 5 hours is how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar enough to earn my stay on the planet for one how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar more day. On the best ordinary days of my life, I write in the morning, go for a long bike ride and run errands in how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar the afternoon, and see friends, read or watch a movie in the evening. The very best days of my life are given over how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar to uninterrupted debauchery, but these are, alas, undependable and increasingly difficult to arrange. This, it seems to me, is a sane and pleasant pace for a day. And if you call me up and ask whether I how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar won’t maybe blow off work and check out the new how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar american wing at the met or ogle girls in central how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar park or just drink chilled pink minty cocktails all day how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar long, I will say, “what time?”

But just recently, I insidiously started, because of professional obligation to become busy. For the first time in my life I was able how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar to tell people, with a straight face, that I was “too busy” to do this or that thing they wanted me to how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar do. I could see why people enjoy this complaint: it makes you feel important, sough-after, and put-upon. It’s also an unassailable excuse for declining boring invitations, shirking unwelcome projects, and avoiding human interaction. Except that I hated actually being busy. Every morning my inbox was full of emails asking me how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar to do things I did not want to do or how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar presenting me with problems that I had to solve. It got more and more intolerable, until finally I fled town to the undisclosed location from how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar which I’m writing this.

Here I am largely unmolested by obligations. There is no TV. To check email I have to drive to the library. I go a week at a time without seeing anyone how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar I know. I’ve remembered about buttercups, stinkbugs, and the stars. I read a lot. And I’m finally getting some real writing done for the first how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar time in months. It’s hard to find anything to say about life without how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar immersing yourself in the world, but it’s also just about impossible to figure out what that how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar might be, or how best to say it, without getting the hell out of it again. I know not everyone has an isolated cabin to flee how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar to. But not having cable or the internet turns out to how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar be cheaper than having them. And nature is still technically free, even if human beings have tried to make access to how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar it expensive. Time and quiet should not be luxury items.

Idleness is not just a vacation, an indulgence, or a vice: it is an indispensable to the brain as vitamin D how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar is to the body, and deprived of it we suffer a mental affliction as how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar disfiguring as rickets. The space and quiet that idleness provides is a necessary how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar condition for standing back from life and seeing it whole, for making unexpected connections and waiting for the wild summer how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar lightning strikes of inspiration — it is, paradoxically, necessary to getting any work done. “idle dreaming is often the essence of what we do,” writes thomas pynchon in his essay on sloth. Archimedes’ “eureka” in the bath, newton’s apple, jekyll and hyde, the benzine ring: history is full of stories of inspiration that came in how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar idle moments and dreams. It almost makes you wonder whether loafers, goldbrickers, and no-accounts aren’t responsible for more of the world’s great ideas, inventions, and masterpieces than the hardworking.

“the goal of the future is full unemployment, so we can play. That’s why we have to destroy the present politico-economic system.” this may sound like the pronouncement of some bong-smoking anarchist, but it was in fact arthur C. Clarke, who found time between scuba diving and pinball games to how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar write childhood’s end and think up communications satellites. Ted rall recently wrote a column proposing that we divorce how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar income form work, giving each citizen a guaranteed paycheck, which sounds like the kind of lunatic notion that’ll be a basic human right in about a century, like abolition, universal suffrage, and 8-hour workdays. I know how heretical it sound in america, but there’s really no reason we shouldn’t regard drudgery as an evil to rid the world how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar of if possible, like polio. It was the puritans who perverted work into a virtue, evidently forgetting that god invented it as a punishment. Now that the old taskmaster is out of office, maybe we could all take a long smoke break.

I suppose the world would soon slide to ruin if how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar everyone behaved like me. But I would suggest that an ideal human life lies how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar somewhere between my own defiant indolence and the rest of how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar the world’s endless frenetic hustle. My own life has admittedly been absurdly cushy. But my privileged position outside the hive may have given how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar me a unique perspective on it. It’s like being the designated driver at a bar: when you’re not drinking, ou can see drunkenness more clearly than those actually experiencing how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar it. Unfortunately the only advice I have to offer the busy how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar is as unwelcome as the advice you’d give to the drunk. I’m not suggesting everyone quit their jobs — just maybe take the rest of the day off. Go play some see-ball. Fuck in the middle of the afternoon. Take your daughter to a matinee. My role in life is to be a bad influence, the kid standing outside the classroom window making faces at how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar you at your desk, urging you to just this once to make some excuse how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar and get out of there, come outside and play.

Even though my own resolute idleness has mostly been a how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar luxury rather than a virtue, I did make a conscious decision, a long time ago, to choose time over money, since you can always make more money. And I’ve always understood that the best investment of my limited how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar time on earth is to spend it with people I how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar love. I suppose it’s possible I’ll lie on my deathbed regretting that I didn’t work harder, write more, and say everything I had to say, but I think what I’ll really wish is that I could have one more how to get rid of ants in the house vinegar round of delanceys with nick, another long late-night talk with lauren, one last hard laugh with harold. Life is too short to be busy.

RELATED_POSTS